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Why Do People Relapse? 8 Common Reasons

When a loved one relapses, people often feel a mix of emotions. These feelings are normal, but they can be overwhelming. Knowing the reasons people relapse can help those affected cope with their emotions by providing a clearer understanding of why it happened. 

Understanding that relapse is often part of the recovery process and not a personal failure can help reduce feelings of disappointment, guilt, and anger. Knowing there are triggers like stress, emotions, or situations that lead to relapse helps family members see it as something that can be worked through, not just a setback. This knowledge can also reduce feelings of helplessness, as it provides a path forward for both the person in recovery and their loved ones to address these triggers. 

While fear and sadness might still be present, understanding relapse as a part of recovery offers a sense of hope. This blog post discusses the reasons people relapse in depth to help family members feel better equipped to approach the situation with compassion and patience, rather than feeling overwhelmed or defeated.

1. Unable to Properly Manage Stress

In recovery, stress can feel even heavier, especially as people deal with the emotional fallout from addiction. Without healthy ways to manage stress it can quickly become overwhelming, leading to the urge to escape those tough feelings. That escape, unfortunately, can often lead back to old habits and a relapse.

For someone in recovery, it’s important to have tools in place to manage stress. If your loved one hasn’t learned how to cope with stress in healthy ways, it can become a breaking point. Techniques like deep breathing, regular exercise, and mindfulness can help bring a sense of control and calm, preventing stress from pushing them back into old patterns.

2. Unresolved Emotions

Addiction doesn’t just impact physical health; it’s often a way of coping with deep, unresolved emotions. When these emotions aren’t dealt with, they can resurface, making it harder to stay on track and increasing the risk of relapse. Your loved one may feel like their emotions are too much to handle on their own, and substances might seem like the only way to numb the pain.

It’s important to understand that emotional healing is a key part of recovery. If your loved one isn’t facing these emotions through therapy or healthy outlets, they may fall back into old habits. Encourage them to seek professional help, if they haven’t already, and remind them that healing is a process. With time and patience, they can work through these emotions and continue on the path to lasting recovery.

3. Influence of Negative Social Circles

The people your loved one surrounds themselves with can play a huge role in their recovery. If they’re still part of a social circle that encourages unhealthy behaviors or substance use, it makes the temptation to relapse even stronger. Negative social circles can normalize the idea of using substances to cope, and peer pressure can be incredibly powerful. Even people who care about them, like friends or family, might unintentionally push them toward relapse if they aren’t fully supportive of their recovery journey.

Encouraging your loved one to surround themselves with positive influences is key. This might mean distancing themselves from certain people or places that trigger cravings or negative behaviors. Being around those who support their recovery and goals can make a big difference in staying on track. Support groups, therapy, and sober friends can help build that healthy, encouraging network.

4. Not Recognizing Triggers

Triggers are specific people, places, emotions, or situations that bring on cravings or the desire to use substances again. Many people in recovery don’t always know what their triggers are, which makes it tough to avoid them. When triggers pop up without a plan for handling them, it can lead to falling back into old habits.

Recognizing triggers is an essential part of relapse prevention. Helping your loved one identify their triggers — and develop healthy strategies to cope with them — can make a big difference in reducing the risk of relapse. This might involve working with a therapist or counselor to pinpoint these triggers and create a plan. The more aware they are of what sets off cravings, the more control they’ll have over their reactions.

5. Lack of Support

Life after rehab can feel worlds apart from the structure and support provided during treatment. In rehab, everything is structured, and there’s always someone there to guide you through challenges. But once back in the real world, many people in recovery face a difficult transition. There’s often an unspoken expectation that they should be able to function independently, which can feel overwhelming, especially when life doesn’t offer the same level of support.

While having loved ones around is helpful in many ways, other forms of support are needed during this time — tools to manage triggers, structure to their days, and ways to deal with the challenges of everyday life. Even well-meaning family members might not fully understand the complexities of recovery. They might not know how to offer the support your loved one truly needs, leading to feelings of isolation or being misunderstood. This lack of understanding can make the transition even harder, and sometimes even fuel the risk of relapse.

If you have a loved one who struggles with addiction, it’s crucial to note that you are not expected to be their everything. Many family members of someone in recovery may wish they could provide all the forms of support an addict needs, but the reality is that it’s often beyond their capacity. A network of professional and peer support is crucial for the person in recovery. It’s okay for you to focus on being one part of that system.

6. No Relapse Prevention Plan (Or Just Not Following it)

A relapse prevention plan is a set of strategies designed to help someone avoid relapse when they face difficult situations. This plan includes coping mechanisms, support systems, and ways to handle triggers. Without a solid plan in place, someone in recovery may feel unprepared when challenges arise. Even if there is a plan, not sticking to it or not fully committing can lead to relapse.

Helping your loved one create a personalized relapse prevention plan is essential, and it’s highly encouraged that they do so with the help of a professional. This plan should include triggers, effective coping strategies, and emergency contacts they can reach out to when needed. A clear, actionable plan provides a sense of security and a practical roadmap for managing the ups and downs of recovery.

7. Complacency or Overconfidence 

Relapse can sometimes happen when someone feels overly confident or complacent about their recovery. They may start to believe they’re “cured” and no longer need to work as hard to stay on track. This mindset can lead to risky behaviors or situations that make relapse more likely.

Those in recovery must always stay mindful and humble about where they’re at in the journey, even those who have been in recovery for years. Recovery isn’t a one-time fix; it’s an ongoing process that requires effort every day. Remind them that staying committed to their recovery is essential to their long-term success and that every step forward counts, no matter how small.

8. Physical or Mental Health Struggles

Addiction is often linked to other physical or mental health challenges, like anxiety, depression, or chronic pain. These struggles can make recovery harder and increase the risk of relapse if they’re not properly addressed. When mental or physical health issues aren’t dealt with, they can lead to feelings of hopelessness or the desire to self-medicate.

Addressing these underlying health issues is crucial for lasting recovery. Whether it’s seeking mental health support, managing physical pain, or staying on top of regular health check-ups, it’s important to treat the whole person. A comprehensive approach that balances both physical and mental health can reduce the chances of relapse and promote long-term recovery.

What to Do if Your Loved One Relapses

Relapse can be tough, but it’s not the end of the road. With the right support, your loved one can get back on track and continue making progress in their recovery. Here’s what you can do to support them:

  1. Avoid Blame or Judgment: It’s natural to feel upset or frustrated, but placing blame can increase shame and make things harder for your loved one. Offer support instead of criticism.
  2. Listen and Offer Compassion: Let them talk about what led to the relapse and how they feel. Listen without judgment, showing that you care and are there to help, not to criticize.
  3. Encourage Professional Help: Relapse often signals that additional support or therapy is needed. Encourage them to reach out to a therapist, counselor, or support group to get back on track.
  4. Reassess the Recovery Plan: This might be a sign that their current recovery plan needs adjustments. Work together to find new strategies or resources to help them move forward.
  5. Focus on Moving Forward: Remind them that relapse doesn’t define them. The important thing is to learn from the experience and keep moving forward with their recovery. Offer your encouragement and help them stay focused on the long-term goal.
  6. Take Care of Yourself: Supporting someone in recovery can be emotionally draining. Make sure you’re taking care of your own well-being and getting support when you need it too.

Find Support for Relapse Prevention

Relapse can be a challenging setback, but with the right support system, your loved one can stay focused on their recovery journey. Having a solid relapse prevention plan and a strong network of professionals, family, and peers can make all the difference.

At Northpoint Colorado, we provide just that. Our outpatient addiction recovery programs offer personalized counseling, support groups, and relapse prevention strategies to give your loved one the support they need to maintain sobriety. Contact us today to learn more about how we can help.